In 2009, when my husband and I announced our move to Kauai, our co-workers’ eyes lit up with envy, as if they were hoping to pack their bags for paradise. It felt like quitting your job and living in paradise was on everyone’s dream list.
Amid the excitement, a friend gave me a book that would shape my journey: “Excuse Me, Your Life Is Waiting,” by Lynn Grabhorn. The author teaches readers how to manifest a dream by focusing on the feelings you want when you achieve them, then imagining the details of your future life. As we prepared to move, I visualized waking up to the sound of birds chirping, sunrise walks on the beach, and working in a cozy home office that smelled of fresh coffee and inspiration.
All of that happened, and life was better than I imagined.
Now, it takes very little encouragement for my brain to spin big dreams. Sometimes I imagine I’m a bestselling author on a podcast and the host asks, “What lesson have you learned from writing this book?”
It takes a moment for me to answer: Cultivate patience.
Living with big dreams means I push myself hard, and I like fast results. Probably because Hollywood films show hopeful authors sitting down full of passion and plot and writing a first draft in one night. And that draft gets turned into a novel a week later, and that novel hits the bestseller charts a few months later.
My truth is different. On Dec. 1, 2020, I began writing my novel. I spent three months contemplating the premise, developing my characters, and outlining my plot. Then I wrote the first draft in one year. Two thousand and twenty nine logged hours in, I’m finishing an eighth draft.
This includes three rounds with a developmental editor who evaluated my work. Each time I need a solid week to absorb her feedback, and sometimes another week to figure out how I’ll implement it. The last round took me one year to deepen my story and rewrite the draft. After beta readers give me their feedback, I’ll start querying agents in hopes of securing representation and a publishing deal.
If the first part of my dream comes true, and I sign with a collaborative agent who believes in my work, and she sells my manuscript to a traditional publisher, I’m to expect the agent and publisher will request additional rewrites. My novel will be on bookshelves eighteen to twenty-four months after I sign the publisher’s contract.
So I’ve learned to indulge patience. I luxuriate in the process of writing, trust my voice, and have fun with every aspect of my writing career. I’ve learned that embracing patience brings a freedom to savor the process and dwell in the joy of discovery.
If you’ve debunked any myths or have your own stories of patience, share them with me in the comments. Let’s connect and inspire each other.
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